the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
