Non-Jews are for practice
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
