i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
