I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize