You made me cry and you don't even care
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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