If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
They have beer where we have blood.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
