but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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