drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize