the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
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