what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
