Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
