Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
