Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
