yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
