I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
he puts the penis in happiness.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
not ubering you a puppy
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
