I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
