He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
