so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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