Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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