i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
