So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
