id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
