But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
