no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Randomize
