Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize