margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i jhust puked up my retainher.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
this hospital has no fireball
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
