community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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