i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
