that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
