And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
