Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
