Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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