I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
