So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
