this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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