On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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