Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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