i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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