the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
