Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
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