just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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