well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
