Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
