roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize