do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
