Sponge bath it is.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Randomize
