Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize