Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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