Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize