dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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