dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
