You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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