think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
There r osticjed everywhere
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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